Life Update

Life is so different with Kohen around. He is such a joy for us and everyone who's around him! My days are full of smiles, giggles, and baby chatter. Although it's hard to have Nick gone so long everyday, Kohen and I try our best to keep busy! We read books and dance, play tickle games and sing. Sometimes we visit Dad at work and I eat lunch while Nick takes Kohen around and shows him off;) After being with me all day, Kohen LOVES to see his Daddy and Nick LOVES to play with his boy. Oh ya, and Kohen just started a new trick..he rolls over on his side when he plays on his toy mat. I was so proud of him when I first saw that. He is getting so big so fast..it's crazy.

Yeah, so we are all doing pretty well. Not too much else new to talk about. Looking to buy a house here soon hopefully. We have one picked out in Cedar Hills that we reallly want. Just have to see if they'll meet our offer:)

Christmas morning at grandma and grandpa's house! Kohen got spoiled a little bit. Here he is in his new hat, slippers, and pj's.(cousin Liam in the background in matching pj's..so cute!) We all had a fun Christmas. Spent the night at Nick's parents and had Christmas Eve dinner with them and part of the extended family.

He can sit in his bumbo chair now!

Loves his little activity mat..

Family pictures

My Birthing Experience and Our New Little Baby Bum: Kohen Jared

I'm about a month late with this post I guess, but things have been a bit hectic. And just to warn, this one may be a little emotional and lengthy and honest. So if you want, you can just scan through the pictures!

I won't lie...it has been pretty difficult for me to adjust to having a new baby! I absolutely love it and him, but I honestly didn't think it would be this hard. I've been ridiculously emotional about things. I don't feel depressed at all thank goodness, but more overwhelmed I guess. Mostly it's the lack of sleep I think, but recovering from the whole process has been one of the hardest things I've had to do as well. Most people must be much tougher than me.lol. I still can't believe it's all over. It was crazy and amazing at the same time and looking back at some of these hospital pictures makes me cry.

THE BEGINNING

So I went into the hospital on September 23 at 4pm to get just a routine NST test and some bloodwork done to determine if I would need to be induced a little early. The doctor had been watching my protein levels closely to make sure I didn't become preeclamptic. But up to this point, everything had been looking fine. I really didn't think anything would come of this test that day. Boy was I mistaken! The nurse walked into the room with the results and informed us that I was being admitted and induced right away.(Luckily I had Nick with me just in case) I was utterly unprepared. For one, I hadn't eaten anything since a bowl of cereal at breakfast and I was starving! Also, I hadn't brought any of my pre-packed bags with me and they wouldn't let me go home. I was not about to let Nick leave me and thankfully he had no intention of doing so:) We had my amazing sister, Katie, bring our things from home. Honestly Katie has been freaking awesome throughout my whole pregnancy. I would have been miserable if it weren't for her. She was always there for whatever I needed. Love you so much KK!!!!

Anyways, everything seemed very surreal from that point on. By about 6:30pm, After getting a room, robe, and IV, it was slow going. I was already dilated to a 3 and about 80% effaced when I was admitted, but that didnt seem to make things go faster. They started the Pitocin drip pretty low so contractions didn't start right away. Since I was so hungry, I took advantage of all the things they offered--popcicles, jello, ice chips, etc. Also a funny sidenote, I had to pee sooo much when they were filling me with fluids and I couldn't hold it! Katie and Nick had the special duty of helping me unhook and carry all the 80 wires and tubes with me to the bathroom several times. Poor Katie I'm sure got flashed a few times thanks to the lovely hospital gowns;)

The doctor (who was so awesome and I LOVE) came in around 7:30 pm and broke my water. Gross. Thankfully it wasn't painful, but yuck. That is all. A little later, and after turning up the pitocin drip quite a bit, I was in mucho paino. Even after talking to several moms and taking the birthing class, I was not prepared for that pain. Nick was great at being there and supporting me...even though the movie "Sahara" was on our tv and he is in love with Matthew McConahey;)FYI: I'll never be able to watch that movie without flashbacks now.ha.

LABOR

At about 9pm they checked me and I had dilated to a 5! I thought I was doing so well and working nicely through my contractions, but felt I should be more dilated than that. They asked if I would want an epidural soon and I kinda shrugged it off thinking, "Ya this is pretty painful but I can hold off longer." So they sent the anesthesiologist home. Big mistake on my part. A few minutes later, I guess they had turned up the Pitocin or something because my contractions became HORRIBLE. And that was bad enough, but to add to it, I wasn't getting a break between them. My pain would lessen, but not stop and I was having a really tough time breathing through them. The nurse that had been monitoring me from outside came in and said "wow, you're contracting quite a bit,huh? I guess we had that up a little too high..." Ya, you think? I couldn't imagine staying in this much pain and more for the rest of my labor, so I finally asked for the epidural at about 9:50pm. (I was watching the clock closely to help breathe through contractions) I was too tired and not getting any relief from the pain. Sadly, the guy had gone home, so they called him and it seemed FOREVER until he showed up. In reality he got there at about 10:30pm, but I was sure I was dying by then. When he got to my room, I was vigorously throwing up anything and everything I had eaten. I was crying and contracting and puking and moaning and just overall in pretty bad shape. It was probably good that I was so miserable so I didn't dread the epidural so much though. It was heaven sent and barely hurt whatsoever! That was a huge relief to me since I had been sooo scared to get one.

PROGRESSION?

I was feelin pretty great after that. I may have even dozed off a little bit. Around midnight they came and checked me again and I was sadly still at a 5. Baby was showing signs of distress, but not real bad. They rolled me on my side and gave me oxygen and that seemed to help a little. But as time went on, Kohen dropped further into the birth canal and his heart rate dropped along with it. His heart rate would drop with contactions and not come back up. Dr. Allen kept coming in and checking me and puttin things up there...a scalp monitor thing to keep track of his heart rate, a thing to measure contractions, and he tried to turn the baby b/c he was facing up instead of down. I could tell he and the nurses were getting pretty worried even though they were trying to act calm. They had started making preperations just in case I had to have surgery. Dr. Allen had mentioned that we may have to, but didn't sound like it was for sure at all. I told him that Kohen and I could do it. Afterall, by then I was 100% effaced and dilated to a 7! So close!! But I was getting scared. Nurses kept coming in and out and Dr. Allen just stayed in the room and we were all silent listening to the slowing beeps that represented Kohen's heart rate. They would slow down so much sometimes that Dr allen would go up there and touch kohen's head to stimulate him and the heart rate would go up for a minute. Finally he said that we really needed to get him out. He was so nice and compassionate though. He had tried everything and kept apologizing and knew that I really didn't want to have a C section, but said baby wasn't tolerating these last stages of labor well and just really needed to be taken out.

THE DELIVERY

After that, things sped up so fast everything was a blur almost. Tons of people were in my room hooking me up and unhooking me and shoving medicine down my throat. I just remember shaking, crying and stopping to look at Nick standing in the corner with a robe and booties in his hands staring down at me with this shocked, lost, scared look on his face. I had never seen him like that before. So serious and scared and worried for the both of us. It just made me cry harder as they wheeled me out of the room toward the O.R. all by myself. I can't even express how scared I was. I've never had surgery or even been in the hospital for anything before and my sweet baby was in trouble and everyone was rushing and not talking to me and Nick was gone and I just wasn't prepared to deal with it all. After they put the sheet up so I couldn't see and strapped my arms out to both sides, Dr. allen started poking my stomach asking if i could feel it still. I could. But the anesthesiologist said its ok if i could feel it as long as it's not a sharp pain. It wasn't, but I was still worried b/c I thought I wasn't supposed to feel anything when they start to cut!! And if i could feel them poke me, then surely I'd feel a knife cut me open! So I was just hysterical and shaking uncontrollably when they said, "Well, we are just gonna get started." So they did. Nick finally got there and I felt Dr Allen cut into me but it wasn't super painful so I'm sure the anesthetic was fine. I was still worried though that I could feel it at all. When I felt a rush of warm liquid spill all up my back I really freaked and started hyperventillating knowing it was blood. I felt a ton of pressure and yanking and pulling and they had to reach way down into the birth canal to dig him out since he had dropped so much. It really hurt actually. It turned out that the cord was wrapped around his neck and arm causing his heart rate to drop the further he descended into the birth canal. I'm not sure if I ever really calmed down, but the whole thing from about the time they rolled me into the OR took about ten minutes.

NEW BABY

At 2:56AM on Sept. 24th I heard my precious little boy cry for the first time and everything that had happened to that point was water under the bridge. Everything was Ok and I was crying for a completely different reason. He was alive and out safe and healthy and had the cutest cry I had ever heard. It seemed forever until they brought him over all bundled up to show me and let me kiss his tiny nose and pink cheeks. I couldn't believe how much I loved him already. It was and is honestly one of the purest, sweetest, emotional, and even empowering moments of my entire life. I had done it. 9 pregnant months, 8 hours of labor, and a c section. It was such a hard, long, scary, amazing and sometimes awful journey. But I had done it and had a perfect adorable loveable baby boy:)

In the meantime, Nick had almost fainted and had to drink some juice and put his head between his legs.(Which he told me later had been a bad idea since when he looked down at the floor he saw my blood all over it. haha. )Gotta love him. Poor guy.

AFTER DELIVERY

Dr. Allen stitched me all up which took about a half hour or so. I was so anxious to go see my boy and hold him. But they had to roll me to recovery and said they weren't allowed to bring me my baby while I was in there. An hour or so later though, in rolls little Kohen! The nurses were so sweet and knew how much I needed him so they brought him to me anyway!! I couldn' t believe how perfect he was! And how happy I was! The whole next day I probably got about 3 hours of sleep and was more exhausted than I can remember being ever. But I had my baby and we were both healthy. I couldn't have asked for more! 4 days later we went home and my mom flew in to help out. Recovery from the surgery has been slow and painful but is getting soooo much better. Feeling more like normal everyday. And more good news is that I've lost 30 of the 40lbs I gained during pregnancy! Woo hoo! haha. Hopefully soon Kohen will sleep better at night and my emotions will return to normal. But we are all doing wonderful and Nick has adjusted quickly and awesomely. He is a HUGE help and loves his little boy more than anything. Kohen is the perfect addition to our family and has definitely brought Nick and I closer together:) We are just all so dang HAPPY!!

Our first family picture. Kohen's Birthday!

Grandma lovin up on Kohen.

Kohen's first bath at home:)

Just Snoozin'...

Chillin' on his Boppy Pillow...

Kohen and Ammon in a staring contest. They get along well!

3rd Trimester Troubles..Advice?

Keeps gettin' bigger! haha. It has been a little bit of a rough ride for me these last few weeks. I guess it serves me right for thinking that pregnancy is such a piece of cake! I mean sure it was weird getting big, but it was going awesome for a nice long time, and I couldn't really complain...

Then came the pain.haha. I'm still not really sure what it is or how to get rid of it, but I'm pretty sure it's not just the round ligament pain the doctor seems to think it is. Sometimes it hurts so bad and radiates out to my hip and down my inner thigh that I can barely walk. It's only on my left side and the doctor said if I lay on that side for 10-15 minutes it should ease or go away. Well I sleep on that side all night with a big pillow in between my legs and that certainly hasn't helped. I've tried laying on the other side and different stretches as well, but nothing seems to ease it. The pain gets especially bad after I walk a lot or exercise. That's a real bummer. So I guess I'm just wondering if anyone else has had a similar problem and if so, how did you solve it? Or can it be solved? Would a Chiropractor help? I'm pretty sure it's not Sciatica b/c I think that goes down the lower back and leg and my pain is more frontal. Maybe I should just deal with it because it's just part of pregnancy?? Anyway, I'm open for suggestions!!

My other scare this last week was quite an unhappy ordeal for me. I went in for the normal Glucose test and blood draw (which if any of you know me, is awful in itself because of my extreme needle phobia). But it turned out that the test came back and my blood sugar level was too high and I am also slightly anemic. Therefore, they put me on an iron pill for the anemia and told me I needed to come back later and do the 3 hour fasting Glucose test to check for Gestational Diabetes. This involved me fasting for 12 hours, going in to get my blood taken while fasting, then drinking a double dose of that disgusting syrup drink, and getting my blood drawn 3 MORE times in hour increments. Pretty much my worst nightmare... Until I discovered what I had in store if my tests came back high AGAIN. If I was diagnosed with Gestational Diabetes, I would have the joy of pricking myself at least FOUR TIMES a DAY!!! And also would have to go to a weekly Diabetes management class, have more frequent doctors appointments, and basically need to completely cut sugar from my diet. Not to mention all the lovely extra medical bills we would get to pay. So needless to say, I was kinda freaking out. My poor husband was at work when I heard this news and when I called him (bawling and thinking that this was the end of the world) he of course thought something much more serious was wrong. I didn't think to explain what it all meant. Instead I just told him how scared and worried I was about it. I didn't know until he got home that day and chewed me out for making such a huge ordeal of it, that he thought I and our baby were in serious danger and may very well die from Gestational Diabetes and Anemia. When he got home he gave me a big hug and told me that if, later that day, someone at work (who was much more in their right mind than I was at the time)hadn't explained to him that anemia just means I have low iron and can take a pill for it, and that Gestational Diabetes is fairly common and can be treated with diet alterations and exercise, he may have had a heart attack. He said he was so worried about me and baby all day because he didn't really know what any of that meant. He just knew how freaked out I was about it and that made him freak out. Ha. Poor little Nick. But I'll admit I was kinda touched when he pulled me into that big hug and told me how worried he had been all day;) I just love him.

Anyways, so I went in for the test with my mom who was thankfully in town at the time. It was kinda awful and I know I'm ridiculous about all of it but I think i'm slowly getting a little better with the whole needles and blood thing. Mom was a huge help and comfort to have there:) After tons of worrying and stressing and praying, it turns out that I do NOT have G.D. Yay!! I sincerely sympathize (or empathize?) with those who do though and admire their strength and courage, even if they don't have the fear of needles that I do. I think that would be such a difficult thing to deal with in pregnancy and in normal life and am so so so thankful that I don't have to. I really have had a pretty normal and healthy pregnancy so far with so few problems and worries. I'm incredibly grateful for that as well. I know people have much more serious and bigger complications with their pregnancies and it makes me count my blessings every day that I've been so fortunate!

Nick always gets his way...It's A Boy!!

Yay!! We found out we're having a baby boy! He's so cute too...at least on the ultrasound:) ha. That was the coolest experience yet though. I couldn't believe how much he was moving around and how he looks like a real baby! He's completely healthy and normal from the looks of things and is growing right on time for his due date.

And yes, Nick ALWAYS gets his way!! Our whole marriage he has wanted a boy first and here we are. Don't get me wrong, I'm crazy excited too, but I was kinda hoping for a girl as most of you probably know;) I already had some girl clothes and what not.haha. I guess that adorable little blanket you got me,mom, will have to be saved for a while! I doubt Nick will let me take home our little boy bundle in a pink ballet blanket....I can't wait for Nick to be able to play with his little mini-me though. He is SOOOOO excited to have a boy to take fishing, and golfing and hunting and to teach how to play basketball.

He's plannin the kid's whole life already and I love it. I think one of the most entertaining parts of this pregnancy for me is watching Nick and his reactions to things. He's hilarious and the most excited Dad-to-be ever. When I walk by, he stares at my stomach. When we sit down, he just rubs my belly and tries to listen to it, (which i tell him is pointless.) and feel it move (which he has prob only really felt 2 or 3 times). The other day he made me feel a little better when I needed a boost. Because lately I have just been feeling so unattractive and chubby...not just in my stomach but just all over big. Anyways, I walked by and he says enthusiastically "Babe, I just LOVE your little belly like that!! It's so cute and I just love it! You can stay pregnant forever because I just think you look so adorable with that belly!" haha. After I got done laughing at his outburst I felt a lot better about myself. So thanks Nick for always cheering me up!

Overall, I've really been enjoying this pregnancy though. I've been feeling great and everyday seems to bring some new excitement or movement. Lately I've felt him kicking me a lot more. I think he likes Shakira b/c he was goin crazy when I was listening and singing along with "My Hips Don't Lie":) Anyways, so thats my newest news about baby boy brown!

Oh and here is a picture of the Belly at 20 wks for you Natalie! I wish you were here so so badly!

It's Hard to Believe, but...

#1 It has only been 2 years that we've been married! Yup, March 24th was our anniversary. This year we didn't do anything spectacular like going on a cruise (like last year:( ) but we still celebrated a little. Nick surprised me and took me to a fancy expensive restaurant in the Joseph Smith Memorial Building called "The Roof" that overlooks the Salt Lake Temple.

It was really really nice..my favorite part was that they played live piano music. The girl playing was amazing and played some of my favorite songs to hear on the piano (like the theme from The Man from Snowy River). It was pretty romantic;) The food was fine, but I didn't enjoy it all that much...partially due to this next fact that is hard to believe.......

#2 I'm PREGNANT!! And we are so so excited to be having a little baby!! Most of you followers of my blog probably already know this news, but I figured I should post a picture of my continuously growing midsection.

This is one I took at about 16 or 17 weeks I believe. We will soon be discovering the sex of little Brown and I could not be more impatient to know what it is!

Our Newest Happenings

I love Christmas, and this year was no exception! Although it was my first white Christmas and first one away from home. I could really do without all the snow and cold for sure. But my in-laws made it really fun and I didn't get too homesick:)

Hallie, Maddi, and Derk all ready to open presents!

My mother-in-law is the queen of decorating for every holiday. She makes everything so beautiful and festive!! Here was one of 2 trees in the house.

The last week or so in January I got the chance to go visit my sister,Natalie in Florida. She just recently had her third child...a little GIRL this time!! I was so so so excited to go meet her and spend time with my big sister and her boys. It was a great week and felt amazing to get away from the biting misery of cold here in Utah, but the trip was much too short!!

I held little Brinley every chance I got. The boys are so cute with her. It was fun to watch.

A change

My hair! I've been wanting to go dark for a while. But finally got the nerve to to it. Maybe I'll go even darker, who knows? ha. But as I said in my previous blog, I like it!

This is the little kitten we were going to adopt. A friend of ours let us borrow him for the weekend to see how he would interact with our large cat. It didn't go so well for Ammon. He was very depressed and ornery. We were pretty sure if we left them together Ammon would eat the little guy..and nick hated that Fido(or as nick called him,Frito) had claws. So sadly..we had to give him back:(

We did have some good times with him tho! Nick said he didn't like the kitten...but as you can see, I found that hard to believe. This is him chillin, watchin tv as I snapped a quick shot of him lovin the cats together. I think I can officially call him a cat person.